A little bit heavy...

Its finally happened. For years I've been waiting for it to happen, but at the same time expecting it never to happen to me. I'm not sure what to call it, but I guess I'd label it an Image Disorder. No, this isnt something to do with photography, but rather me. Plain and simple. I find myself hating to look in the mirror, because all that looks back is a plain person with dark circles under her eyes, dry skin, heavy thighs, love handles, and plain hair that does not flatter my face. My first issue is my face and hair. I get tired even just thinking how to blog about it. I guess my face I've come to accept, because short of a eyelift or similar there isnt much (if anything) I can do about it. My hair on the other hand is another story. I have it professionally coloured every six to eight weeks, so the colour is fine, but the cut isnt. Sure it looks great for the first week or two after I get it cut, but then it just goes back into the same boring style when I tie my hair up: middle path, stupid horn-like fringe ("bangs" for my USA readers), which just looks stupid. There also isnt any body in my hair, so when I tie it back, unlike some gorgeous people I see walking around, my hair just looks unwashed, even when its clean. I try lift it and use hair clips and such, but they just dont work, or probably more likely, I dont know how to use them to their full potential (how pathetic is that, hey, a woman with long hair who cant do anything with it). I've tried curling it, but they dont stay in, and they annoy me after a while...I like being able to brush my hair, and with curls, the best I can do is run my fingers through it. I'm waiting for my colour to arrive and then I'm going to try a new haircut. I want a bigger fringe, one that doesnt end up looking like horns, but I know the haircut is going to be a stressful event, as, well, my mother is my hairstylest (she's been a pro hairstylest all my life) but you know how it goes when its family...arguments break out where they normally wouldnt with a customer. Also maintaining it is a problem (I'm lazy). I know, I know, I want to have my cake and keep it all at the same time: stylish hair with no effort. Pfft, like that will happen! Next to my mom and my sister, I look like an ugly duckling with my hair. My body is probably my biggest gripe. My mother and sister are both size 26-28 (not sure what that is in USA sizes, sorry) and I'm a 34...wow just typing it in that comparison makes me feel huge :( I know, given my bone structure, that its almost virtually impossible for me to be a 28 but I'd be happy with just a 30! Thats a decent size for me...I'm not asking too much??! I'd just like to try on a dress and not have to worry if I look fat in it. Ok, sure, thats what every women wants, but having a mother and sister so thin, why is it so difficult for me?? I love food, there's no denying that, but lately I've been trying to cut back on everything I eat. I'm even about to start eating off of a sideplate just to make my small portion look bigger!! My disorder now has reached a point where, when out shopping with my sister and mother (something that doesnt happen very often any more for obvious reasons), I see myself in the mirror and feel horrid. I hate myself. I went out today and did some browsing, caught a glimpse of myself and nearly started crying. I just hate it. And this is the part I never thought I'd get to: hating myself. I feel large and ungainly in everything I wear, I have to struggle to find jeans that dont make my ass look huge, I cant wear most of the in-style tops because they just dont flatter my figure, and lets not get started on swimwear. I watch my sister try on jeans, and no matter what style she tries on, she looks good. Flare, bootleg, skinny, pencil, capris, they all look good. The cargo pants type material...sheesh I cant even go near that or I look huge. I hate it. I'm sitting here typing this, and I'm even starting to tear up. The problem is, I cant seem to lose weight. I know I dont have to lose weight, but rather tone up and do some exercise, but I have no time for it. None whatsoever. And when I did try gym 3 times a week, it didnt help to the extent I thought it would after the few months I'd been going. I'm now starting another gymming plan, and hopefully I've finally mentally and emotionally cracked enough that it becomes easier to stick to day after day. Same with eating. Today, I had a thin rusk for breakfast, with some tea, two and a half crackerbreads with some cottage cheese, and then later, while walking around the shops, a peanut butter smoothie (how healthy is that *rolls eyes*). For dinner, since its Tuesday, I'm having veggies, a chicken breast, and a chicken wing (Michael will get sauteed potatoes again :D). Every day is a struggle and I hate it! I'm getting to the end of my tether and I dont know what to do! *sigh* I guess I just need to rant about it on here, since talking to my mom and sister only gets me comments like "oooooh, you shouldnt eat that!" while I'm eating something, or "uh-oh, thats going to make you fat", or "careful, when you're older you're not going to be able to lose the weight and you're going to end up like {insert name of older, larger person}"....its a wonder why I didnt get this disorder sooner. I know I'm not fat, I weigh 53/54kgs, I have a larger bone structure than my mom and sister, and I'm 5'2". I just wish my inner thighs didnt touch, that I didnt have love handles, and that I looked good in any dress I try on. Ok almost any dress (at least). PS: The meal in my post Chicken Tuesday...with a difference! is not the normal sized meal I have...its normally smaller, that was an unusually big piece of chicken!

Chicken Tuesday...with a difference!

So, Tuesday nights in my house are called Chicken Tuesdays. This name came from when I started making roast chicken pieces for dinner, and somehow it always seeemed to be on a Tuesday.

Last Tuesday I was treated to dinner, since the following day was a public holiday, so we missed out on Chicken Tuesday that week (I think there were other dinner arrangements for the other nights of the week that week) and this Tuesday I attended an Intel function at our wholesalers (they gave away camo jackets and had a prize-giving air rifle shooting competition :P) so again, no Chicken Tuesday.

So, last night I finally got down to making chicken and thought I'd try something different with the potatoes for a change. I've been watching Masterchef with my mother every day on BBC's Lifestyle channel, so I guess thats where I got the urge from.

Anyway, I decided to make Sauteed Potatoes! Ok ok, so its simple enough, but for me, its a Big Thing. I cubed up the potato (we only needed one, it was a large potato), boiled it in a pot of water with a little salt, and then heated up a non-stick frying pan with quite a bit of oil in it (not enough to "deep dry" the cubes). In went the cubes, I seasoned them, and waited until they turned golden brown on the outside, turning them as needed. Drained them onto some paper towels, and served. It was DELICIOUS! They were crispy on the outside, and simply light and fluffy on the inside!! Just mouth-watering! Michael loved them and is now demanding that I make them more often! They were soooo good!

A photo (which doesnt look as appetising as it was, I assure you!) for you to see:

Yes, thats a very large piece of chicken, they're not normally that huge and normally I dont serve myself potatoes (carbs and proteins 'n all that). Hmm, and the potatoes were a little more golden than that...actually...why am I posting this photo at all?? It simply doesn't do these wonderful sauteed spuds justice!

Coming soon....!

So, I've been debating getting new friends for Orlith for a while now and finally decided to get two new girls :) Contacted one of our breeders, Wheatfields Rattery (no online presence at the moment, unfortunately, or I'd include a link), and she told me she'd be breeding some Huskies soon. Immediately I wanted one (or two), but the mating didnt take. Luckily, another mating she had tried before that did take and out popped three ratlings: two boys...and one girl! The girl was a little smaller than expected, so she didnt tell me about her in case she wasnt going to rehome that one, but the little one is doing fine and she was immediately picked by me (even before I got the photo!).

Photo courtesy of Wheatfields Rattery

The next decision was whether I was going to pick from an existing litter of capped and hooded Dumbos, or whether I'd wait for the next Husky litter. Of course, being Ms Impatient, I asked for photos of the Dumbos :P I had a nice selection, and eventually decided on a black capped one with a mismarked face :)

Photo courtesy of Wheatfields Rattery

So now all is left is the wait, and of course the naming! I'm more leaning towards keeping the same theme, which at the moment is dragon names from the books of Pern, by Anne MacCaffrey. I had four "computer" names before: Linux, Apple, Intel and Xeon, and now I think four "Pernese" names are suitable: Feyrith (RIP) and Orlith.

The names I'm leaning towards are Ramoth, Prideth, Wirenth (pronounced "whirr-enth"), and Meranath (though this one I struggle to remember haha). Decisions decisions! Michael thinks I should name them something completely different...but what (if you have any suggestions.....)? I like themes, and meanings behind names, and at this point I'm reading the Pern series, so it fits. Also then the names will run in groups of four and the next babies I get after these two will be new names.

*sigh* I guess I'll eventually come to a decision, but I think Ramoth definately has a spot ;)

More pics, simply because they're too cute!

Top view of Black Capped Dumbo

Photos courtesy of Wheatfields Rattery

Jamaican me thirsty!

Its been a pretty slow and uneventful week, but I'm glad its Friday! National Heritage Day just passed on Wednesday, so that was a pleasant day spent inside relaxing. The (fluff)Friends application on Facebook has been having a treasure hunt (to celebrate International Talk Like A Pirate Day), so we've desperately been trying to find 500 gems before the hunt is over (you get a Googely as a reward, but its difficult to explain what it is on a blog). On Wed I found 150 gems! It was a loooong day! Haha! This weekend will be spent hunting like mad since the hunt ends on Sunday night. I have a fever blister :( And its been around since Tuesday! Had one a few weeks back, but I remember I was stressed about something (cant remember what it was now....couldnt have been that important I guess) but I dont recall being stressed about anything now....*sigh* Hopefully it'll be gone by Monday... Went shopping yesterday evening with Michael, and we decided to buy some filter coffee, since we havent had a pot going in ages. So we bought House of Coffees Jamaican blend and WOW is it NICE!!! Its smooth, creamy, aromatic, but not too strong...very, very pleasant! In fact, I think I'm going to get a cup as soon as I'm done with this blog post! Oh, forgot to mention I took photos this week of my dogs (yes yes, I need different subjects by now, I know :P). I think they're my best yet! Max made a proper appearance, and was very cooperative and did his tricks for some Beenos. If you like or dont like them, drop me a note to tell me which and why :) You can see more pics in the Recent Pics slideshow to the right. I'm also looking forward to going away next month for a weekend. It'll be Michael and my 5 year anniversary and it'll be nice to get away. Viia's coming with, and hopefully it wont rain the whole weekend haha! Last time we had such a great time and I always enjoy it! We'll definately be having cocktails at a restaurant on the beach if its decent weather! Yay! I think thats about it.....I'm gonna get some more delicious coffee now :P

International Airshow

So on Friday I got myself all packed for the airshow on Saturday. Packed lighter pants (in case the weather got too hot), another top, my Crocs (yes, I have Crocs, get over it), a windbreaker jacket (learnt my lesson last show!), and the same for my bf (only he wore his lighter pants, and took warmer pants instead). Also packed a beach mat (unlike the pic, I dont have the bag and my mat is orange, not pink) which is handy to have underneath a blanket. I dont have a rugged-type blanket, so borrowed two from my mom. Also thought to pack suntan lotion and Disprin in case anyone got headaches from the sun. Packed a flask of coffee to drink in the queue since we were planning on getting there around 8am, and we expected a chilly morning, what with all the grey skies we've been having all week.

So the next morning, Michael didnt want to get up early haha even though it was he who decided on the time, so we ended up only getting there at 8.30am-9am. The queue was not even 5 minutes long, and the morning was really nice, warm weather! Blue skies all over!! Fantastic! All was well...until we reached the field, or should I say bog! All the rain we've been having made the field incredibly sloppy, depsite all the hay and straw they put down to help. It took us AGES to find our friends (who arrived at 6am), but the spot we had was decent :) It was right on the edge of the field against the runway barrier. We didnt look around the airshow stalls as our bags were heavy and we wanted to put them down. We would have gone back, but struggling through the boggy ground wasnt fun, and that put us off (though Michael went back once to get food for us).

Soon as we settled down, we put on sunscreen (though we still got burnt a little, which I think was more wind burn than actual sun burn). I hauled out my camera right from the start and got right down to snapping away. The show included displays of helicopters, boeings, smoke displays, tanks, and fighter jets. There was also a Mini War Demonstration which involved cargo drop-offs, parachuting soldiers, and morter bombs going off amidst gun-fire (all controlled, and safe, probably all blanks :P).

Sure the fighter jets are great to watch (and this year, the speaker system was better, so we all got to actually hear what was going on and what plane was what this time), but my favourites are the Boeings. Those huge beast of machines soaring gracefully in the sky just fascinate me. All that metal, over our heads....wow! This year we were treated to a few Boeing displays: a Boeing 747 (which was privately owned by one man), an Airbus A340 (which was also flanked by four fighter jets - you could hear the proximity warning alarms going off when they patched through to the pilot), a formation of two Boeing 737s, and a chance fly-by of a Boeing 767 coming in from New York.

I think the highlight of the day for most was Thunder City's English Electric Lightning which broke the sound barrier...twice (you can see the pic I took of the Lightning at the top of the post). It was louder than we think the co-ordinators expected, but it was amazing to hear (even set off people's car alarms). Apparently people complained and thought bombs were going off (I have to ask, who doesnt know about the airshow when there are planes flying overhead practising for at least a fortnight beforehand??!). I was glad our dogs were mellow from the tranqs, though Gizmo still bolted upstairs and ended up sitting in the shower for cover :(

All in all, the day was great! Feel free to browse through my Airshow Album or just watch the better photos summary in the slideshow in the Recent Pics section on the side, though that might be gone if you're reading this a week or so (or whenever I have more "recent pics") after I've typed this.

Airshow time again...

So, besides this week being rainy, its also been filled with the sounds of jets flying overhead practising for the International Air Show happening this weekend.

I think it happens every three or four years, and its normally quite spectacular, but alas, the poor animals in the area get very upset. In fact, during the last airshow, some riders were out in a group on their horses, a jet flew over spooking the horses, who tossed their riders and bolted back to the stables (across traffic if I'm not mistaken). Only one rider managed to stay on her horse, the rest had to walk back. All horses made it back ok. I was standing around the stables around that time and a helicopter flew over, which led to a stampede of frightened horses looking for somewhere safe. The wimp in me (I'm sorry, I love horses, but they scare me sometimes) jumped out the way for safety, but a friend of mine dashed in and grabbed the lead rope, securing the horse. Everyone was ok then as well.

As it stands this time, our dog, Max (not in the photos yet), is clearly terrified of the noise. He shivers and shakes and just cannot be calmed. We've tried ignoring him, didnt work. We tried comforting him. Didnt work. So I dashed out and got some NutriCalm for them. Apparently its very good and homeopathic, so its safe to use, so here's hoping it helps them. The effects apparently last around 4 hours, so I got enough for two doses per day per pet. Gizmo and Roz (our cat) will get some too. The second dose, however, I think I will make a half-dose, since the effects of the first dose should help somewhat.

I'll let you know how it goes. Thankfully, my mom and sister will be home this weekend, so the pets will have company. I will probably be at the airshow (I feel ashamed since its so hurtful to the animals' ears, but its a such a great photo opportunity)...lets hope the rain holds off. Weather forcast said its supposed to be sunny over the weekend, but then again, they also said it was supposed to be sunny this week....err...I dont think so!! Keep fingers crossed!

Dog Photos! aka Photographers-Block Solved!

I have been in a photography lull for a while now, what with it being winter and all, and it was really getting me down. A week or two ago I stumbled upon a blog called Dog Parks and they have some really wonderful tips, as well as some links to incredibly inspiring pet photographers...so of course, this prompted me to get my butt in gear and start using my camera! Today looked like it was going to produce somewhat ok weather, and I planned on taking some photos while walking the dogs on our local field, but unfortunately that didnt happen (mom took them later, though). However, dont dispair! I got some photo-time in after mom finished mowing the lawn (I was pushed into action by Gizmo rolling on the grass). I dashed in, grabbed my camera, and here's what I got (please feel free to leave any comments, good or bad - I'm always up for critique!!!)

Gizmo:

And one photo of our cat, Roswell:

Please excuse the watermarks, but these photos do get displayed on numerous sites and, well, internet theft 'n all...

More photos can be seen in the slideshow on the right hand side.

So a huge shout out to Dog Parks blog and a huge Thank You to all who inspired me!